How to Be More Attractive to Men!

11 Things You Can Do To Be More Attractive From A Man’s Perspective

By Nicodemus Hilaire

I do romance readings and life coaching and most of my clients are women. While I may get to help them, my aim with this article is to give a MAN’S PERSPECTIVE to the lady loves out there on how they can be more attractive. I wish to reach a greater audience than those that I have the honor of being their personal adviser. I also believe that some advice from the opposite sex is much needed especially when I read the names of the articles of the “girly” magazines at the grocery checkout line.  Now I am a gentleman and I am a Man Beast so… forgive me as I say it how it is. I promise I will not be too mean, I love you all too much to do that to all of you.  On the other hand if you do not heed my advice it is ok you may pair up with another woman or a desperate man. It is all up to you. I am not a fascist, I am actually quite liberal but these things seem to be universal especially among male heterosexual men. I made it a point to bring this up in the company of other men many times. I used a sample size of men much larger than 30 to make sure this is statistically relevant. I have done my homework.

But let’s get to it.

  1. Please do NOT cuss or spit.  It is just not attractive when a woman can swear more frequently and louder than I wish to hear ever. I enjoy the company as do all men, of women because they are feminine.
  2. Please do not shave the sides of your head and dye the top of your head neon. It tells me that you have the mindset of a 17 year old Miley Cyrus, no matter if you have a gorgeous body. If us men are out there looking for a woman and we see you looking like that, I know it is not fair but that is what many think. But even the best of us see a girl. The worst of us see an insecure girl that they will try and will try to take advantage. This mindset started occurring to me when I transitioned from looking at night club girls to looking for a woman.
  3. It is a known fact that men, like it or not judge more with our eyes than anything else. This IS evolutionary biology the same way that women are far more likely to read erotica. So knowing this no amount of hair dye, make up, tattoos or anything else can get around this, go to the gym. Look up what the healthy weight is for your height. I am by no means trying to create an epidemic of anorexia nervosa, but as a woman your best ally in getting that “Man of Your Dreams”, is to NOT BE 30 lbs overweight. It is not attractive. “Body Positivity” is a ridiculous lie that will make you miserable. This is the lie that women are beautiful no matter their size. Call it what you want but science does not lie. This is reflective of a personal philosophy of owning your successes and failures as the only way to create success. (More on this in another blog.)
  4. When in doubt do the feminine thing. When you are thinking it’s business casual I could wear tight jeans… NO wear the dress, believe me we take greater pleasure in taking something off we do not wear. It is sometimes a mad thrill of a challenge. We love each other for our differences. Would you be attracted to me if I wore very tight jeans and a tight shirt? No! You want me to look like a MAN when I approach you. It goes both ways.
  5. DO NOT CUT YOUR HAIR LIKE RACHEL MADDOW! NO! JUST NO! It is ok for her because she does not like men but is attracted to women.
  6.  If you have a bunch of guy friends and no girl friends, it is widely known pseudo-science that you are full of drama. Stop hating yourself and get some girl friends. It may even be easier for your friends to get with my friends and we all will have a good time. I am talking laughs, bbq, beach, sailing not orgy. Unless you are all into that.
  7. Do not push for commitment like it is a game of chess, chill out for about a year. You will know if it is worth it. If not hunt me down, I will listen and help you sort it out. Every human interaction falls into two categories control or connection. Connection is laughing, trading stories and goofing off and yes intimacy. Control sounds like this: “Where are you?” or “Why didn’t you pick up your phone?” No one wants to feel pushed into anything. After dissecting relationships for so long I have coined a term. “Voluntary Monogamy”= This is what what happens when there is so much connection and no control. The man and the woman will both be the apple in each others eye and as a result of all that connection that is the way it goes.
  8. *It is 2016 if you think porn is cheating see a psychiatrist. I think cheating is defined by what would hurt your partner if they were to know. But porn come on! 😉
  9. Get a HOBBY, few things are more sexy than a woman who has a passion. This is also an indicator to men that you have other things in your life. Play the mandolin, take up archery or learn to sew. What is important is that you have something just for you. It says right from the start I will not be clingy.
  10. NEVER EVER SAY THESE TWO THINGS WHILE IN AN ARGUMENT “I CAN ALWAYS GO SLEEP WITH BILLY THE BETA GUY!!!” OR “I AM CALLING THE POLICE.” In the case of the latter no you do not want to be sleeping with Billy or you would be so STOP IT. Sit and talk like an adult and not a girl. It is a silly play for dominance. In the case of the former with the Police, unless you are in imminent danger it is a petty plea for dominance. Not only is it petty but it is dangerous to him and a TRUE MAN will not look at himself in the mirror and hear that in his memory. I do not care how emotional you feel or how much you had to drink. Women grow up too. That is putting him in more severe danger than you know unless you have some experience with the criminal justice system.
  11. AND….. SMILE!!!!!!!!!!!! WE LOVE NOTHING MORE THAN TO SEE YOU SMILE!!! IT MAKES OUR WHOLE WORLD LIGHT UP AND MOST OF ALL ESPECIALLY YOU LIGHT AAAALLL UPPP. A SMILE MAKES AN “8” A “13”. That is the truth.

Remember MEN & WOMEN are VARIANTS ON THE SAME THEME OF HUMANITY.

MORE CONNECTION LESS CONTROL!!!

AND IF YOU NEED A LITTLE HELP WITH RELATIONSHIP CHESS HUNT GOOD OLE’ NICO DOWN!

WITH HONEST LOVE! NICO!!!

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2 thoughts on “How to Be More Attractive to Men!

  1. I agree with what you said, Nico. I know that there are still guys out there that might like the whole “17 year old Miley Cyrus look” but those are a minority and it still makes a woman look like she’s got some confidence issues. “Just be yourself and stop trying to copy anyone else” is the best advice I could give such a woman. Pushing for commitment is a “problem” most women these days have since they want this too early on. A man will get to that but be patient. Hurrying it will not make things better, quite the contrary.

  2. Absolutely Andrew. And Ladies out there if you do not push commitment guess what happens? It becomes his idea. This will be pursued much more aggressively if the man thinks it is his idea.

Give us your perspective!